CIP:)
ive been a happy girl recently! YAYness:D
haha i guess ive found happiness in doing service. hmm ive been trying to find a better word for tt since 'service' sounds quite degrading to e ppl i interact w:X..welllll lets jus say tt ive found happiness in interacting w my kids!:D lalala i really love e feeling after i depart frm my service centre. i love how my kid wants me to teach him, i love how my kid wants me to go back nxt wk, n e wk after n even nxt yr:) i love how my other kids draws something n gives it to me. i love how they dont mind playing with me and coming to me asking me to teach them. i jus love e fact tt im appreciated n loved n i can at least leave a mark on their lives by showing tt i care:) n i really do care!:D
nnnnnn apart frm my kids, got to interact w several minds kids on saturday at sentosa. n i guess it really opened up a different world for me. these kids are sooooo adorable. esp e kid tt i took care of. wadever she lacked in mental or physical capabilities, she made it up w her warmth n enthusiasm. her hugs r seriously amazing. n when i hold on to her, i feel this sense of happiness wash over me. i dunno how to explain this, but there is this thing tt i feel for her; i love seeing her smile, i love seeing her laugh, i love seeing her open up her arms to welcome me in her world:) (n im NOT paedo k im jus motherly hahaha)
the saddest thing bout e whole event is having to say goodbye. i really wish tt i can go to e centre/sch to help out, but ive already committed myself to my henderson kids, n i dont wanna overcommit only to back out one day. cos if this happens, then i really wont be fair to whichever set of kids i 'abandon' just cos i have no time for them. n already at this moment, i get uneasy thinking of e day i have to stop service at the later part of this yr cos of e As n everything n my mum might not approve. cos it means tt im sort of abandoning them when they need me most to help them in their studies cos its also eoy exams for them.
sometimes this then gets me wondering bout e meaning of service projects. u walk into their lives n brighten up their days, only to walk out soon after. lloyd said something tt made me think even more. he said before us, there must be so so so many other ppl organising these events for them. which means tt their lives are full of goodbyes. can u imagine feeling so happy after one whole day of fun n thinking tt e 'jiejie' really cares for u, only to have her disappear n nv to get to see her again? tt care n concern was only for tt moment. it doesnt last. doesnt this make e kid feel even more insecure, thinking tt whoever walks into their lives wont last? esp for kids who have troubled homes etc, wont they feel even worse? thinking tt no one really cares after all. i really don like this fact. i wish i cld do something bout it, but i really dont have e capability to reach out n stay with every single one of them:( i want to brighten up their lives; but on the other hand, im afraid of the time i have to say goodbye. whether this short happiness in their lives is worth it compared to e goodbyes they have to face.
:(
boo okie moving to a less depressing topic, i shall tell u more bout flag day! even though many think that its a very useless n meaningless activity, flag day is actually very very very impt to alot of organisations. for some organizations, these activities are the only possible avenue of donations they have from the general public to keep their centre running. they are not as rich as other more established organizations to have donations pouring in willingly from the general public, but have to depend very heavily on these flag day proceeds to maintain the costs of just running the centre for the whole year.
after being a part in organizing e apex flag day, i know how demoralising it is now to open an empty tin. believe it or not, there are actually tins which are empty! empty la! haha n apart frm e empty tins, e lowest record we got was 5cents. which is really pathetic. seriously, 5cents doesnt even cover the cost of one tin, which is bout 65cents? n the greatest irony is tt students doing flag day are supposed to rake IN donations. not spend more money of the organizations-_- these organizations need our help, and what help are we giving if we are unable to cover even the cost price of the tin can?
so ppl, pls don think tt flag day is useless. whatever form of cip u all do, just put in ur heart in doing them. because if u dont, whether is it interacting w kids or helping old folks or collecting donations, all these would be so meaningless.
yay okie i completed my long entry liao!:D
haha i guess ive found happiness in doing service. hmm ive been trying to find a better word for tt since 'service' sounds quite degrading to e ppl i interact w:X..welllll lets jus say tt ive found happiness in interacting w my kids!:D lalala i really love e feeling after i depart frm my service centre. i love how my kid wants me to teach him, i love how my kid wants me to go back nxt wk, n e wk after n even nxt yr:) i love how my other kids draws something n gives it to me. i love how they dont mind playing with me and coming to me asking me to teach them. i jus love e fact tt im appreciated n loved n i can at least leave a mark on their lives by showing tt i care:) n i really do care!:D
nnnnnn apart frm my kids, got to interact w several minds kids on saturday at sentosa. n i guess it really opened up a different world for me. these kids are sooooo adorable. esp e kid tt i took care of. wadever she lacked in mental or physical capabilities, she made it up w her warmth n enthusiasm. her hugs r seriously amazing. n when i hold on to her, i feel this sense of happiness wash over me. i dunno how to explain this, but there is this thing tt i feel for her; i love seeing her smile, i love seeing her laugh, i love seeing her open up her arms to welcome me in her world:) (n im NOT paedo k im jus motherly hahaha)
the saddest thing bout e whole event is having to say goodbye. i really wish tt i can go to e centre/sch to help out, but ive already committed myself to my henderson kids, n i dont wanna overcommit only to back out one day. cos if this happens, then i really wont be fair to whichever set of kids i 'abandon' just cos i have no time for them. n already at this moment, i get uneasy thinking of e day i have to stop service at the later part of this yr cos of e As n everything n my mum might not approve. cos it means tt im sort of abandoning them when they need me most to help them in their studies cos its also eoy exams for them.
sometimes this then gets me wondering bout e meaning of service projects. u walk into their lives n brighten up their days, only to walk out soon after. lloyd said something tt made me think even more. he said before us, there must be so so so many other ppl organising these events for them. which means tt their lives are full of goodbyes. can u imagine feeling so happy after one whole day of fun n thinking tt e 'jiejie' really cares for u, only to have her disappear n nv to get to see her again? tt care n concern was only for tt moment. it doesnt last. doesnt this make e kid feel even more insecure, thinking tt whoever walks into their lives wont last? esp for kids who have troubled homes etc, wont they feel even worse? thinking tt no one really cares after all. i really don like this fact. i wish i cld do something bout it, but i really dont have e capability to reach out n stay with every single one of them:( i want to brighten up their lives; but on the other hand, im afraid of the time i have to say goodbye. whether this short happiness in their lives is worth it compared to e goodbyes they have to face.
:(
boo okie moving to a less depressing topic, i shall tell u more bout flag day! even though many think that its a very useless n meaningless activity, flag day is actually very very very impt to alot of organisations. for some organizations, these activities are the only possible avenue of donations they have from the general public to keep their centre running. they are not as rich as other more established organizations to have donations pouring in willingly from the general public, but have to depend very heavily on these flag day proceeds to maintain the costs of just running the centre for the whole year.
after being a part in organizing e apex flag day, i know how demoralising it is now to open an empty tin. believe it or not, there are actually tins which are empty! empty la! haha n apart frm e empty tins, e lowest record we got was 5cents. which is really pathetic. seriously, 5cents doesnt even cover the cost of one tin, which is bout 65cents? n the greatest irony is tt students doing flag day are supposed to rake IN donations. not spend more money of the organizations-_- these organizations need our help, and what help are we giving if we are unable to cover even the cost price of the tin can?
so ppl, pls don think tt flag day is useless. whatever form of cip u all do, just put in ur heart in doing them. because if u dont, whether is it interacting w kids or helping old folks or collecting donations, all these would be so meaningless.
yay okie i completed my long entry liao!:D
posted by jilyn:) @ 10:33 PM
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